Wednesday, October 22, 2008

INVOLUNTARY SPASMS ENJOY THE SHOW!!! additional sentences added

First thing this morning I step on to my street and I see a woman cloaked in red walking her dog cloaked in red. The car starts and immediately Phillies victory cheering expels over the airwaves. All the while "Song 2" by Blur followed by Metallica's "Enter Sandman" is the choice of background noise for such celebration. The whole way into work I kept flipping through the stations to hear all of the enthusiasm.

It wasn't even 8am yet.

Anyway, this is coming from someone who knows nada about this season or the last 15 but it's going to be an incredible week as well as tiring. It's kind of a big deal. I admit I know nothing about sports. At one point in my life I knew a little. I'd check the papers for the scores (no really I did). I could differentiate the teams. I knew which teams were on the National and American Leagues but that was over a decade ago. I forget everything now. Remember starter jackets? Yeah, I wore one in 4th grade (mine was a basketball one though). I'm almost certain the only reason I followed sports for that brief period in my tiny life under and around the age of 10 was because I looked up to my brothers/Dad and well I played some sports too. That ship has since sailed and while I'm unbelievably excited (and surprisingly so) for these games it will not get me liking sports any more than the day before. I mean shit, just the other day I wore an LA Dodgers tee (just for the colors and cursive) unknowing that the Phillies had been playing them. This is how little I know about sports. I will continue to live my life in this fashion. It's just nice to see everyone so enthusiastic over the same event. Annnd there's seven games. This makes a difference in the height of crazy because it extends in over a period of time vs one night.

Also, my work cares a lot about sports. So much so that we get to dress down in t-shirts and sneakers as long as we wear red and/or Phillies shirts all week. Since I don't have any Phillies stuff at my place (maybe in my parents attic?) I've opted for a red t-shirt with a cheerleader jumping on it that says "up with spirit". Strangely, I thought this shirt would never serve a purpose.

Today a Phillies banner came through the regular mail. I just think it's funny that when the Fedex man walked through the office wearing a Red Sox cap everyone poked there heads out of their cubicles like a pack of confused apes. One guy actually got confrontational by standing up in the middle of his aisle furrowing his eye brows. He said, "did that guy just..." Another one said, "I think he did." This man has probably been a Red Sox fan for a good chunk of his life. He's got his reasons. Stay back! Also, another guy at work said he has his hang over cure already nestled in his fridge for tomorrow morning. He was also the same guy telling the whole corner of the office that he walked outside in nothing but pants and his Phillies t-shirt (in 50 degree weather) this morning sipping an iced coffee looking at everyone looking at him.

Get ready for the bonanza. Guns will be fired, people will be arrested, fire crackers will explode, pots and pans will be beat, out of shape painted shirtless men will piss in our streets, and trash from excitement well blow down the streets like tumble weeds. All in the name of sports and blind pride. Stock your fridges with bottles of water or grape Pedialyte. You're going to need them! 'Cuz those dehydrated calves are going to be hurting. Note: According to a co-worker Pedialyte is good for hang overs. He learned it from Metallica.


Also, I will never. ever. Mention Metallica twice or even once in another post for the rest of my whole damned life.

1 comment:

Dig said...

I don't even think I can start to picture you wearing a starter jacket. And I'm sure shit will start to get even more crazy if we win some more games.